Dont chase MY Pippicat!

Whut a skerry fing to happin.   Mama herd sumbuddy yellin' in owr front yard (ware me an' Vito can't get to).  She an' Papa camed owt da kitchin dore an' dere wuz owr naybor skreemin' fer hiz doggy (hu wuz offa hiz leesh) cuz he ran after owr Pippicat an' habbed her trapped under da car.  Dis habs happinned befor.  So Mama sed to da man, "Dat dog belongs onna leesh! He bedder not hurt my cat!"  Da man skweemed at her, "Shut up, yu wakko!"  Kin yu beweev it? So Mama sed bak, "YU r da wakko!!! - Keep dat dog onna leesh!"  At dis, Papa neerly came owta da dore but he seed Mama wuz under kontrol so he letted her handle it but he wuz waitin' rite dere if he wuz needed (an' he wuz weelly innoyed).  An' da man kep skreemin' an got tween Mama's car an' Papa's twuk an' cud not ketch hiz doggy.  Den he finely gets da doggy onna leesh, hits him, den skeeems awl da way down owr dwiveway - ober 100 feets long - an' awl da way down da street  (about a fowzand feets) skeeemin' awl da way in a vewy skerry voyse.  So gess whut?  Munday Mama iz cawlin' da annymull control offysur an' sayin' sumfin' bowt dis happinin' awl da time.  Wast time da Pippicat wuz on da front porch - a zillyun feets away frum da rode an' dat doggy camed after her but Mama stepped in frunt ov da Pippicat an' tol' da man to keep dat doggy onna leesh (yeah rite!).  Da man duz not say heez sorry or nuffin'. Jus' skreems at Mama hu nebber eben tawks lowd at him.  Whut a weerd hyooman.    An' he cawls ME vishus cuz he seez Vito an' me playin' an' we ressull and growl an' bawk wen we pway. (Oh - an' I woof at him ebry time he goze by cuz he yewws at me an' sez bad werds.)  I fink HE iz vishus!  Whut a skerry man!

Arfur (hu wudda saved da Pippicat if he cudda got owta da fense!)