Arfur hits da jakpot!!

WoooHooo!!! I am da happyest boy awownd! Wast nite Mama an' Papa bwot us sammin an' weelly tender chikky.  It wuz gwate!! Den dis day, Mama putted on Vito's leesh an' weft me home. I wuz howlin' an' singin' in da yard to wet her no I wuz not a happy hownd. Dey wuz gon a LONG time. I went owt den camed in an swept on da cowch, den went owt an' howled a widdle, den came in an taked a nudder nap. Wen dey gotted home, da furst fing I did wuz sniff Vito up an' down. An gess whut? He wuz at DA VET!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!! Wuz not me!! YAY!! I cud smeww he habbed 2 shots!! YES!! Not da Arfur! Onwy Vito! An' I no he dont care. He wuvs to meet peepull an get pets an skwitches an' wuvved on. I jus' want no shots an' to be weft awone...weww, maybe a widdle pet an' eer skwitch...but dats awl! So we bofe wuz happy boyz. Until now. I smeww wazanya in da kitchin an' can't get dere. Mama iz ignorin' my cwies. O rats, dere she goze puttin' it away.
I fink I am gonna go teez Vito cuz he got fatter! He ways 55 pownds!! Faddy faddy 2 by fore, cant jump in da car no more!! Needs a boost up wike me (an' I onwy way 54!)!!  HAHA!!

Til nex' time...
Arfur

Gud boy bad boy

We wuz reely gud boys on Fwiday. Awl day until after supper - hooman supper. We wuz leevin' da kitchen wen da widdle bugger snarked at my eer, so I givved him whut for, finkin' dat wud end it. Nope. Mr. Short Fyooz wost it and came on wike a vishus idyut. Mama an' Papa jumped into da fway, gwabbin' Vito an' wokkin' him up in da cwate. Wen he loozes his cool, it takes him a wong, wong time to calm down. So da peepuls habbed to lissen to him whine and growl an' cry and snort until he gotted normul agan. Don't bodder me - I cant heer him no mor. Den, Mama cawt us actin' wike brudders at beddy time. A miracul weely, cuz we nebber do dat.

Today we bin fine. I habbed run owt ov my CBD oil an' incwedibwy, dey sended it in wun day! Gud fing. I don't wanna looz my sooper powers agan. Onwy fing iz now wen I am hungwy, I am HUNGWY! Abowt a zillyun times a day. Mama iz twyin' to figger owt a snak chart dat wiww keep me wess hungwy. Akshully, she wuz owtside pooper skoopin' an' I wuz followin' her da hole time beggin' fer a cukky. Hmph. Did not get wun...too close to supper she sez. An' now no snakkies in da yard eever. Now we gots an owr to go an' eben Vito iz winin'. An' he dont take no CBD cuz he spits it owt. Mama sed tuff luk - its too spensive to waste on a bwat. So it iz MINE and I kin jump up on my chare agan an' sit up an' wook adorabul, too. Yoof in a bottel. Tiww nex' time...
Arfur

Da grate ol' hound caper

AAARRROOOO!!!! Dis iz my furst post ov 2018 cuz I wuz watin' fer a BIG wun! BWHAHAHA!!!
It awl beginned wif Mama an' Papa's adbenchur. Papa wuz admiwing hiz big bloo twuk az normul wen he seed it habbed no pwate on da frunt. It wuz GON. So Mama got on da 'puter an' seed dat to get a nudder wun, dey habbed to go to da poweese an' repawt it. So dey weft us home an' sat in da poweese stayshun fer a zillyun yeers. Da nise man sended dem home cuz awl da poweeses wuz bizzy. Ok, now da nex' day Mama did it by hersewf. Sat in da poweese stayshun, tawked to dem, got da paperwurk an' gotted tode dat she bedder hi tale it to da DMV or Papa wud get stopped, puwwed owt of da twuk an mite eben hab a gun poynted at him!! Cuz it wuz goin' on da ayr az stowen. So Mama hopped in da car, weft us awone awl day cuz she habbed to go reel far away to da DMV cuz da local wun stinks. She cud not beweev it wuz pwaktickly emty. It onwy taked her two forms, two wines, an' 6 dowwars to get a noo pare ov pwates an' a noo regernashun paper fingy. An' a nudder warnin'. Bedder bwing in dat udder pwate dat wuz weft rite away cuz now it iz stowen. SO - she hopped in da car, dwove a zillyun miwes to Papa's werk, gibbed him da noo stuffs, gotted da ole pwate, came home an' cowwapsed. She shudda gon bak to DVM. But she cud not moov, cud not bweeve, wuz gwooed to da big ol' chare.

Mama's chare - an MINE!

Dat meens she habbed to go bak to da DMV pwase da nex' day. An' she did, weevin' us awone agan cuz she did not no how long it wud take. BWAHAHAHA!!! Dis time da pwase wuz pakked wif peepulls. By da time she gotted fru da line to turn in da pwate fingy, she wuz warin' down agan. Dis time she gotted home an' kwik gotted on da puter to unwind. She cud heer skwatch, skwatch, skwatch - whiiinnnne, whiinnnne tiww it dwove her to see whut da heck wuz goin' on. She fownded dat stoopid Vito skwatchin' at da bottum ov da chare an' cwyin'. So she mooved da chare. Dat widdwe skunk gotted us cawt! Wile she wuz gon, we puwwed down da kukkie jar, popped open da wid an eeted awl da kukkies 'sept da wun dat rolled under da chare. Cuz wen she seed dat wun kukkie, she fownd da emty jar hidden under da tabul. But it gets bedder. Papa came home an' did not no whut we did an' he saved us haff ov hiz turky sammich!! BWAHAHAHA!!! Got to admit, awl dis ackshully maded me sooo hungwy! I nagged Mama awl nite fer sumfin' mor. Nummies! Mor nummies!! I bin hungwy sinse I gotted dis noo medisin cawed hemp oyl. An' now I kin sit up agan, cwime agan, jump agan...fings I cud not do fer a wile now. An' after awl dis time - bak in twubble!! Seenyer dog my futs! I iz a pup agan! hehehe...
Layter...
Arfur

Arfur in da kom bat zone

I not shur whut iz goin' on but doze tweez iz frowin' fings at Vito 'n' me! Evwy time I go owt to do my bizness, I gets hitted by hard widdwe bawws!! Vito duz not want to go owt dere. Mama wuz mad cuz he peed inna howse, but I am shur he gotted hit in da hed an' gave up goin' owt dat dore! Awso, da gwass iz fuww ov deze widdwe fings. Vito finks dey ar to pway wif. I say NO! It iz ammo fer da treez! Dey hurts! How ebber, we hav fownd a way to uze dem. We put dem on da flore in side an' we made Mama twip free times! We shur gets her attenshun! BWAHAHAHA!! We iz lukky da bwellas to da piknik tabels is stiww up cuz we kan wawk awl ober da patty o wifowt gettin' hit.  Meenwile its rainin' bawws...ware iz my hard hat?? Or a bwewwa.  Pwitty soon we wiww need boots to pwotekt owr feets too! How ar we spozed to chase doze dum chickmunkies if da pwase iz cuvvered wif bawws?
OWCH!! Dat wuz a BIGGER wun - and harder!! Grrrrrr....wate till I find Papa's buzzy twee cutter! Dey wiww be sowwy!! An we wiww hav mor wud fer da stove to keep us tostie! If onwy I had fums.

Mama iz MAD

It bin a wile dat I rote ennyfing. Bin sorta borin' fer doggies wif da heet an' awl. It stoppid raynin' so Mama started da gwill! YUM! Wile she wuz gettin' fings reddy, I hadda potty, so I went an' wen I fot she wuz not seein' me, I turnid awownd to tayst sum. Drat! She wuz lookin' an' ran to get dat skooper. She pikked dat up, den went bak to gwillin'. Me? I went a widdle away frum dere an' went agan. She seed me an' pwaktickally cawt it. Dat womin! So, she dis pozed ov da poops an' a cuppla mushywooms, den wawked bak to da gwill. Her job wuz dun..............NOT!!!! BWAHAHAHA!! She steppid up to da gwill an' sed, "Whut iz DAT??!!" Den she lookid down an' seed I weft an nudder BIG wun rite in frunt ov da gwill on da patty o. An' it habbed her footy pwint in it. Her BIG footy pwint. Weww, I dont no fer shur if I kin teww yu whut she cawwed me, but da naybers herd it, so I'll tell ya. She cawwed me a Poopyhed! Yu bad ol' poopyhed she sed. {chukkle}{choke} Uh, skyooz me, I am uh twyin' to not laff. I am bak in my bed now an' she habs to gwill. She bin runnin' da hoze twyin' to wash it away - hehehehe- its reely stikkin' tho. I'm a baaaaad boooy! HAHAHA! An' I not bord enny mor!

Da yeerly basset piknik

Ebry yeer we hab a big piknik on da day we wemembew da soljers dat died. Speshully cuz da slaves noo peepulls dat died an' dere famlies wuz in da wars. But reely speshully cuz dey luv bassets, basset peepulls, fwends, an' gud fuds. (At leest Vito 'n' me wike da gud fuds hehehe).

Dis yeer we habbed five ov us bassets - Dexter, hu can't see, but has a gwate sniffer; Horton, hu iz a widdwe shy; Cleo, hu rools wif a iwon paw; Vito, an' me. We gots lots an' lots of pets, snakkies, an' snooter kisses frum da peepulls. Eben Horton, hu wud uzhually stay by his mama.

It wuz code an' rayny. So Papa lit up da chimminee up an' da wood stove to keep da code away.
We eben habbed myoozik. Unka Jim bwot a gittar an' he pwayed an' sang songs to us.

I did not get fru da day wifowt gettin' in twubble. Dere wuz so much fuds on da taybul an' no buddy wuz by it. Get da pitcher?

Me chekkin' owt da taybul

I gots a pees ov cwakker, a cuppla liks ov cabbidj, sum hammy burger, an almos' got sum froot salad, sum roles, an' a fyoo udder fings neer da edj. I ayn't tewwin' no buddy whut else cuz den dey wud get madder. I did get putted in jale fer a wile. But I iz too cyoot to stay dere an' dey letted me owt to get pets an' luvved on agan. I can not wate untiw we do dis agan. I jus' luv pikniks.
 

Da chikken torcher

Mama putted chikken on da owt dore cukker. It wuz smewwin' soooo gud! Vito 'n' me wuz sneekin' up on dat an' gotted cawt by Mama. I wetweeted to da middul ov da yawd ware I wuz plottin' to ambush da cukker. Dis wuz me plannin':

Den she lokked us in da howse. :(

Too sad to keep ritin'.
Arfur