OH OH OH I FERGOT - GUD NOOZ!!!

My book can be gotted fer yer Kinkle - --- what Vito?  Oh, it's not - oh - sorry - Kindle....dat rite, Vito?   Yes?  Gud.  It iz now an e-book an' 100% of da profit wiww go fer rescue...Howse ov Puddles.  Yu don't get it frum me, tho, not like da paper book.  Yu kin order it from yer e-book store.  If dey duz not hab it, rekwest it cuz it iz able to be gotted.  So ask fer ARFUR T. LEADBOTTOM SINGS fer yer Kindle.  Mama's name iz on it - Beth Howering.
I iz so 'sited!

Arfur

Fanksgivin' revenj

Whelp, Mama an' Papa left us awl day long AN' when dey comed home dey smewwed wike turkyburd.  An' taters, an' punky pie an' gween beens an' Gramma an' a lot ov udder peeples we wud hav wiked to sniffed in pawson.  (To say nuffin' ov tastin' dat yummy fud.)
So...Vito gotted up a nickzillyun times at nite an' evry time he nudjes Mama to pickup da cuvvers so he kin burro under.  I stayed at da side ov da bed an' skritched an' chooed an' whined an' awlso gotted up on Mama's hed at wun time durin' da nite - I meen Vito cant hav awl da fun.  Vito awlso almost pushed Papa owta da bed after steelin' hiz cuvvers, too.
Dey dwagged der hineys owta bed dis mornin' so Papa cud go to werk.  But dey wuz not perky - nope.  An' we iz still cravin' turkyburd.
Arfur

Shhhh...secwet!

Shhhhh....hehehehe....dont tell!  Papa iz habin' ote meel dis mornin'.  At leest he finks so.  Wen Mama wuz not lukkin' I gotted sum widdle paks ov ote meel.  No wun will eber find dem.  Wait!  Vito mite.  I better get dem owt from da cowch cushins an' eet dem now, huh, or dat widdle snot mite jus' get dem furst.  Uh - - bye!

Still feelin' impish

Mama wuz not lukkin' at me.  She wud not tawk to me or eben pet me.  Ackshully, she wuz sleepin' in da chare cuz she coffed awl nite.  I had jus' gotted da buttin' offa papa's aypff pare ov pants.  No Mama.  No yellin' - nuffin.  Now I gotta find sumfin' reelly speshul.  Hmmm...chomp, chomp - SNAP!  Chomp, chomp - SNAP!  smack, smack, chomp...
HAH!  Dat waked her up!  She herd me!  "Wha?  Whutcha got, Arfie?"  WHAT????!!!  WARE DID YU GET DAT!!!  GIVE!!!  Yu heer me?? GIVE!!!"
Whelp...I gived it to her - er, I meen DEM.  I gived DEM to her.  Dey wuz reelly chewy.  But I did it.  I gotted da fingers offa her yello gluvs.  I hadda clime up an' get dem offa da bak ov da majik bole ware dey wuz dryin'.  I fink she fergotted dem dere.  But I fownd dem...an' I gotted eben.  Now dey gots no fingers in dem.  Gess her paws will get wet hehehehe...
O fooey!  She gotted a nudder pare ov dem.  An' me?  I gotted a nudder time owt  in da chare wile Vito gotted to take a nappy wif her.   Hmmph.  Gess dat wuz not such a gud plan.  Gonna take a nappy wif my hedjy hog.
Later,
Arfur

2 in wun day

Ok, not bin postin' cuz da mama habs bin sik.  So now I gotta ketch up a fyoo fings.  Will start wif dis day an' go bakwerds.
Dis day Mama taked me an' Vito in da car.  We wuz reely happy an' awl reddy to shop an' get chikky nuggits. NOT.  Az soon az she turneded down da mowntin an' not up to da storez I noo we wuz in trubble.  Den wen we drove into da parkin' place I wuz shur ov it!  Vito, he waggies hiz tale no matter whut no matter ware.  He jus' wun happy fella.  Awlso, I dont fink heez dat grate at r'memberin'.  So heer we wuz at da vetman.  Vito goed furst an' wud yu beleev it - he gotted 8 pownds bigger!!!  Da vetman sez no fat...dat he iz in gwate shape - wike me!  So now we iz wun number on eech side ov 50 pownds.  I sat by da dore bein' reelly gud cuz I wuz hopin' dat dey wud ferget I wuz dere.  Not a peep did I make.  I saw da doc giv Vito FREE shots!!  Wun in da back, wun in da sholder, an' wun neer hiz hiney!  Only wun made him eben luk and he yiped on dat wun.  Ok, now I be nerbuss - wait - I wuz nerbuss befor, but now I am reelly REELLY nerbuss.  Vito gets down, I get on da scale, an' gess ware da bonehed iz?  On da scale wif me!  I DO NOT WAY OBER 100!  Mama gets him off an' den dey put me on da taybul.  After gettin' feeled eberyware, da doc gibbed me my free shots an' I did not eben flinch.  Cuz I am brave.  But to tell ya da troof, I nebber gotted free shots befor - only 2.  I gotted Lyme like Vito gets cuzza da bad tiks dis yeer.  Now, bak in da car, bak up da mowntin, bak up da driveway, into da howse - I GOT DA SOFA!!!! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..............

Hmmph!

Arfur here, wif a big grrripe.  Mama sez dat sleepin' wif me is like sleepin wif yer hed in a bag of Free Toes.  She sed it makes her wake up hungry - hay - I ALWAYS wake up hungry!  Den suddenly last nite, she sed, "PEEEWWW!  ARFUR!  Whut did yu DO??"  It wuz bad enuff to be smuvvered wif free toes.  But she sed I hav gon frum free toes to soooidge.  Den she wooked me ober an' fownd my gratest prize ov da day...it wuz reelly fresh too wen I rolled in it.  I smell GRATE!!  Whaa???!!!  A whut??  She sez I need a baff - A BAFF!! She wants to take away my wunderful noo smeww!!  No fare!  Cud sumbuddy save me frum dat peeewwy shampoo?  I don' wanna smeww wike flowerz...I wanna smeww wike poo!  Oh fooey- der iz no scapin' dis  wun...heer she coms wif a big ol' towl.  Kwik - sumbuddy ring dat dorebell!  Noooooooo........

Sunshine an' leefs

Iz ennyfing bedder dan sunshine an' leefs?  Well, snow iz mor fun, but den Mama won't play wif us.  Wif leefs, she iz owt dere blowin' doze awl ober da yard an' makin' a BIG wind fer us to run froo.  We just hav da mostest fun, Vito an' me...oh, yeah, an Mama.  Den it iz time fer a nap in da sunshine. Den we go in, gets a snacky, go bak owt an' run froo da leefs, take an nudder nappy, den go in an' nap inside an', an' - whelp, yu get da pitcher.  Wunderful dayz.  I luv da leef fallin' dayz.

Arfur

Arfur, 5, pants, 1

I be in da doggy hows agan.  It reelly iz worf it, tho.  Still goin' fru my secund puppyhood an' have now got 5 buttins offa da pants frum Papa's you neeforms.  I did hav wun problem.  I taked a diffrunt pare ov pants...Mama cawed dem jeens.  Did not get dat buttin...OWCH!!  Dey iz diffrunt sumhow - dey hurted my toofers.  Mama iz upset cuz she cannot see gud enuff to soe on doze buttins cuz her glasses need noo wuns.  O well.

She did forgiv me, tho.  She gibbed me da bestest eer skritches aaaaaahhhhhh....sooooo guuuud.  Papa caws dem eer gazims cuz I mone an' cloze my peepers an' get awl floppy.  MMMMmmmmm.......so nice.

Arfur