Hewp!! Weez bein' attacked!

Vito an' me hab bin tryin' to wawk arownd da yard.  We wuz mindin' owr own bizness when WHAM!!  OWCH!!  Whut wuz dat???

Vito started runnin' fer da doggy dore but I started wookin' fer da criminal dat attackeded us.  OWCH!!  Dat hurts!!  Whoa, gotta run fer da piknik tabel fer cuvver.   < Click!>  Holey moley its not safe even heer! 

 But I did find owt hoo iz hittin' us.  It's da treez!  Dey iz spittin' nuts at us!!  Da grownd iz got lots an' lots ov nuts awl over it!!  It hurts yer puddies to walk on dem!  Stoopid treez!  Gotta go get Papa to cleen dem up so we ken enjoy owr yard.  OWCH!!!  Cut it owt!  Oooh, dat hurts...ware iz da saw?  Weel fix dem treez! not if Mama habs ennyfing to say abowt it.  She sez a rake will fix it.  OK - fer now.  She sed if we wud stop chasin' da skwirrels dey wud be gone.  Hmph!  Like I beweeve dat!

My Lady an' my Papa snuggle

I saved Mama

Dis mornin' Mama wuz sayin' g'bye to Papa an' wen she came in I woofed an' warned her dere wuz danger! Wuf! Wuf! WOOF! Now she stood by da kitchin gate an' wooked to see whut I wuz woofin' at. She sed, "Arfur! Dere iz nuffin' dere! Hunny dat iz a pees of da rug!" An' I woofed. Cud she not see da big hyooj monster on da flore? She came up an wooked reelly close. Oh, Arfie! It's a fly! An' yu fownded it! An' she taked her shoo an' WHAM! It wuz gon. Whew! Now we ar safe frum dat buzzy fing! I saved da day! I fink I will spend sum time in da crate ware it iz safe.

Later,
Arfur

My teers ar fawlin'

Evry day I am wating at da dore for my Lady to return. I cry an' I cry an' don't pway wif Vito or nuffin'. Wy did day take her away? Mama tells me, "Arfur, she iz not comin' bak." But I dont beweev her. She hasta come bak. I wiww lay heer an' wate until she duz. Why, mama? Why iz she gon? How com peeple ar meen? Not awl peeple, but sum peeple? I am gwad I do not liv wif meen peeple enny more. Mama an' Papa luv me a hole bunch, an' my Antie Torrie, an' my Unka Mike an' Antie Alice - dey luv me. Eben my Unka Chukklehed luvs me. An' my twolegger brudder Craig - he sez I am hiz fayvorit. Wy duzn't da hole world luv? I am hurtin' so much, an' Mama an' Papa - dey hab broken harts.

My missing blog

I rote a sad story an' it diss appeerd. Pooey.

How to make yer mama laff

Today I fownd a reelly fun way to make my mama giggle an' laff. She was snugglin' wif me an' Vito watchin' her nooz an' I putted my vewvet wips nex to her eer an' furst I wicked her eer, den I softly sang in her eer. WELL!! She sed dat wuz da most bootyful sownd she ebber herd an' she laffed an petted me an' luvved on me an' kissed me on da snooter! So den I kissed her bak...more giggles. An' I sang sum mor...more giggles! Dis wuz so much fun an' wen she stopped I butted her an' gave her kisses on her wips an' sang sum mor. Whut a fun mornin' I had...cuz Vito wuz under da bwanket an' he didn't get nuffin' but a few skritches :).
Hab a reely nice day evrybuddy...yer singin' hound,
Arfur

Sitement for mama

Gess whut? This day mama went to run...air runs, ya know? An' when she duz dat, she coms back wif awl kinds of neet stuffs dat smells reeeellll gud!! Whelp, today she wuz on da rode an' tryin' to get on da innerstate (whutebber dat iz) an' she wuz awlmos' run offa da rode by a big black an' wite fingy wif lites flashin' on it. At furst, she fot she did sumfin' rong (she nebber duz, but she werries). Den, as it passeded her, she started to hed to da ramp an' WHOOPS! dere iz a big ol black an' wite truck rite behind it an' it awlmos' GOT HER!! Whew! She zipped outa da way an' den when it passed an' she gotted a hind it she seez it sez: BOM SKWAD!! Now herz is swettin' bullets cuzza she 'members dat 9 wun wun day reel well an' wen da bridge blewed up neer here an' udder stuffs. She wuz reelly re-leefed wen it went rite past her exit an' kept on goin'. Shur wuz glad it did not follow her home! Day mite hab arrested me an' Vito fer bein' nawty! Oops gotta get offa da 'puter cuz she iz comin' in da dore frum mowin' da gwass!

DWAT! An' I had mor to tell ya, too! Whelp, later...