Hu wudda thunk?

Nebber thot I'd be riting this - dat my brudder iz a brave but dum hero.  Last nite I wuz takin' my nappy on da big chare an' I cud heer Vito wif hiz deep ol' "WOOF!" owtside.  I figgered he wuz woofin' at da gotes an' I had awreddy had my turn an' it wuz time fer my nap.  Mama kep heerin' him an' got da lite an' went to see whut he wuz barkin' at.    Furst she gotted him in da howse in case it wer a bare or skunk or sumfin' like dat.  She surched evryware but cudn't see nuffin' but a pare ov peepers shinin' up in da gote pen.  Yellow peepers, reddish uppy-sticky eers...mus' be Pippicat - an' dat wud explane da nukklehed barkin' hiz branes owt.  So she cawls..."Pippi!"  Nuffin' but a blink.  "Heer Pippi!"  Nuffin' - jus' an udder blink ov da yello peepers.  So Mama, dum lady dat she iz, opinned da gote gate an' wawked up da hill.  Now da goties wuz nurvuss.  Dat werried Mama cuz dey iz not afrade of much.  Dey gots horns!  (I kin teww yu frum furst hand speeryense).  So Mama wawked.  Az she went up da hill, da critter got up an' ran away but not far.  Den she cud see da bushy tale - a fox!  So she shooed it an' it ran a liddle mor, but still not owta da gote pen (witch iz pritty big - bowt a aker).  Now she coms an' gets me an' Vito - cawz gosh darnit I am woke up now.  She haz us sniff da yard an' pee an' stuff...but no barkin' cuz dere wuz no fox dere now.
So hu wudda thunk my brudder wud be a heero?  Not me.  He's a dum pane in da...fooey Mama iz sayin' nuh-uh.  So I tole yu an' now it iz nappy time agan.
Arfur

                                              Vito on watch